I need to have a major rant. I probably sound like a broken tape recorder but it is going to be this way for the next 5-6 weeks.
Apparently Teachers go through a career cycle in their life and honestly at this point in time, I seem to be flying out of it, or more formally known as going through “disengagement.” There have been highs in the past few months, but they have been followed with major lows. Over the past week I’ve had “fuck care” moments but I’ve also had “I can’t just walk away” moments. And for the latter moments, they have been related to professional development of staff. This has led me to realise that I really want to be a trainer. Sadly, I am 100% certain that my current Organisation is not the best to support me in this next stage of my career. There are too many barriers and restrictions to overcome before even being considered for that position.
No trainer I’ve met in my field has stayed at only one Organisation for more than 8 years and been automatically asked to be a trainer. They have all been to different Centres, experienced different work cultures and settings before going into the field of training. They’ve also had very supportive leaders and co workers who have inspired them and pushed them to become what they are today.
At this point in time, I wish I had that role model whom I could look up to at my workplace and just be constantly inspired/ motivated to be like her. I realised throughout my teaching career, I had that one person, but now that I’m working alongside her, she provides no form of inspiration whatsoever. If anything, she would be the main reason I leave the Organisation. It’s really so sad how things change.
But with all that being said, I hope when I look back at this post in a few months time, that I will never regret the decision that I’m about to take as I recount the hellish time I’ve had to go through and be glad for the the freedom that I (will) have soon.